I’ve begun this several times, going into detail on why and how I’m broken…but it all comes down to, “it’s good for others to be happy, but it’s my job to suffer and support them.” The technical definition of that might be “co-dependent behaviors stemming from a misattribution of the value of demonstrating caring for others.”
We’ll just call it “stupid” as a sort of shorthand.
With the redhead’s help, I have gotten over “stupid” enough this week that, in the interest of furthering my revisions, we have purchased me a laptop (christened, for reasons I don’t understand, “gogo”) so that my revising can be done anywhere I have ten minutes to spare.
Buying this was utterly terrifying. I’m thrilled to have it. My redhead is very good to me.
And, just for a change, so was I.