April strikes again.

My grandfather, Pop-pops, died at 93.

I want more. I’m not done. I’m not done. Please.

I had to call Cinderella and tell her, and we both broke (me, again). I need to call her back.

My office door is shut, and I won’t open it. I spent some time curled up against it.

Bridgette is coming for me, which is good.

Oh, fuck. I have to talk with Eric and ma and Othello and California and

I finally have access to a Very Nice Toy; a program called Crystal Reports. With it I can filter the DB and pull out information to, for instance, generate a report that is the cover sheet for our subcontract, cutting my data entry on subcontracts exactly in half.

It will do some other things for me, as well, but that’s the biggest time-gift I expect to get from it.

The problem: This is the most unintuitive program I’ve yet seen. After fiddling with it for 45 minutes, I have no idea how to do a damned thing with it.

But I have the tool, and, when I master it, I will be like unto a god in this place, and all will fall at my feet and worship. And I will be a much less stressed person.

Ugh. I just ran for 40 minutes with a song from my childhood running through my head in perfect cadence to my pace.

I’m bringing home a baby bumblebee,
Won’t my mommy be so proud of me….

Ugh. Ughughugh.

Today was the first time, ever, that I tried to get Hap’n’ Frog into my internal soundtrack. Praise be to Heather.

Okay. So.

What I am frequently called on to do
• Evaluate estimate for reformatting - manual in EST

• Reformat estimate - manual in EST and .txt file
• Transfer estimate to database
  • Transfer - automated

  • Determine correction issues - manual
  • Correct Descriptions - data entry
  • Correct Values - data entry
  • Review w/ estimator & PM - interpersonal
• Create database documents for each estimate
  • CTC - automated

  • Production Unit Report - automated
  • Time Card - manual in Excel, from DB
  • Field Worksheet - manual in Excel, from DB & EST
• Subcontracts
  • Enter in DB - manual data entry

  • Type contract - manual in Word
  • Review with PM - interpersonal
  • Review with CFO - interpersonal
  • Print individualized document packet - manual in Word
  • Type Transmittals & Mail - manual data entry
  • Process returned SC - interpersonal
• Educate Estimating users - interpersonal
• Educate DB users - interpersonal
• Brushfire control on computers (”My printer doesn’t work”) - interpersonal
• Monitor user weekly DB usage; evaluate for CEO - manual
• Database
  • Evaluate requested corrections for internal consistency w/ DB - manual

  • Correct issues on estimating side - data entry
  • Massage DB side to match estimating - data entry
  • Review corrections with CEO - interpersonal

Digested list:
• Data Entry - may be delegated: 3

• Data Entry - may not be delegated: 3
• Interpersonal: 8
• Manual - can be automated: 2
• Manual - can be partially automated: 3
• Manual - cannot be automated: 1
• Automated: 3

Which tells me that, if I work to improve the delegation of data entry items and the automation of the manual items (through DB queries, Access DB machines to aid evaluation, and so forth) I could reduce the amount of personal brain resources used in about a third of my job duties.

A 30% reduction of stress might accompany that.

So I need to add a 24th job description item: Automate & Delegate

Okay. A goal is good. Now I’ll determine a plan to go with it.

Grump.

I have time to write. I have will to write. I do not have the coherency to write.

All the free time I have is in the evenings — after working, fighting back entropy in the house, feeding everyone, and collapsing in a heap on the love seat for two hours. That two hours is my window, and by the time I get to the window, my brain is insufficiently focused to write. Hell, sometimes I don’t have the focus to read.

The obvious answer is to go to bed for those two hours, rise in the morning, fresh, and write then. Which has me, then, working all day after until it’s time to fall into bed and sleep. No time with Bridgette, no time with Othello.

Gr. I don’t like my [apparent] choices.

I think I could get in about 30 minutes of writing in 5-15 minute bursts throughout the day, but I’ve found that doesn’t produce the best writing. In fact, it produces very nearly the worst. The only way I can do worse than that is to write when my brain is exhausted. Like after work.

Gr, some more.

I suspect the issue is that my workday frequently exhausts me. The stress here is over the top, and I am called upon to work miracles for other people’s work while staying up on my own. Perhaps if I can reduce my work-stress, I can leave here not-exhausted, and have some reserve for the evening.

So. What I think I need to do. Is figure out how to work a high-stress job where I am the sole person capable of a variety of things, all time-sensitive, on which other people’s performance depends, without being so stressed that I am depleted.

Some thought will be required, here, I think. Perhaps I can organize the miracles I’m needed to perform so that each one is not a virtuouso impromptu performance. That would take a lot of the stress out.

Hm.

Meme: Take lyrics to a song, paste them to Google Language Tools. Translate them from English to German, then from German to French, then from French back to English. Post the lyrics on your blog and ask people to guess what song it is.

Today’s song:

Me you were made wound. Me desecrat you left yourselves. Me you were made penetrate. Me you were made complicate. help me. I broke besides my interior. help me. I do not have a heart aiming to sell. help me. the only thing which works for me; help me to receive far from me. I wish you in Arschloch which wants an animal. I would like to believe you an interior. I wish you in Arschloch which wants an animal. my complete existence is defective. You to receive naeeher more me with a god.